まあ別に100周年でもねえし、死ぬこともねえんだが誇張は大事だろ!だからそこつっこむなよ!!
てか、N○Kで10代がいろいろ語る番組あるだろ?でもやっぱN○Kだから、そこまで過激な議論にはならねえだろうよ。しかもこの番組終わるらしいから、代わりに俺が受け継いでやろうと思ってNa。けど今日闘わせるのは『20代』だ。いいかげん、理性的に物事を考えることもできるようになってる年だし、なおかつ、感情的な気迫もまだまだ残ってそうだからな、10代より白熱すること間違いNothing Problem!!(間違いの問題がない=間違いない)
それじゃあ選手を紹介するZe。赤コーナーは、三度の飯より仕事好き、働くことに全力疾走「クーリー(仮名)」選手!
しかばね:「どうですか、今日は勝てそうですか?」
クーリー:「ニートとか、ほんと情けないですよね。僕が勝つに決まってます。というかニートなんて、あんまり言うのもなんですけど、社会の『負け組』ですよ(笑)」
いきなり過激なコメント!闘いたくてうずうずしてるんだNa。青コーナーも呼ぶか・・青コーナー、ニート界のヘぼ、っと、へビー級チャンピオン、「うつお(仮名)」選手!
うつお:「おいジャッジ!!」
しかばね;「はい?」
うつお:「俺はライトなニートでも、ヘビーなニートでもねえ・・究極だ、アルティメットなんだよ!てか、お前噛んだだろ、『へぼー級』って言いかけただろ!!俺はへぼーでもヘビーでもねえ・・アルティメット級なんだ!絶対に間違えるんじゃねえ!!」
しかばね:「ごめんなさいだYo!」
両者共々興奮してるから、さっさと始めなきゃあNa。
それじゃあ、レディ〜Fight!!(カァ〜ン)
■1ROUND
うつお:「正直言うけどな・・働いてない俺は、ほんとに偉い!人間として!!クーリー君だっけ?あんた、人間としての『尊厳』みたいなもの、捨ててるよ。あんた、生活するためのお金を得るために、働いているんだろ?」
クーリー:「まあ、そりゃそうでしょう。」
うつお:「そうか、当たり前か・・けど俺はな、お金なんて大嫌い!だから働かないんだ!お金のせいで俺は、いい車にも乗れねえし、うまいメシも食えねえ・・オーロラを見にいきたいのに、そこへ行くにもまたお金・・ほんと自分の好き勝手、自分の自由に、日々を過ごすことが出来ねえ!はぁ〜!お金なくても、楽しく暮らしたいんだよ!高木ブーのウクレレ教室も、毎日朝から晩まで二年間通いたいんだ!!働く時間を削ってな!!マジ、なんでお金いるんだ!お金ムカツクぜ!うっとおしい!!まじ、お金のせいで、俺は自由気ままに過ごせねえ・・・ほんとお金のせい、お金の野朗、俺につきまとうんじゃねえ!!」
クーリー:「ただのわがままにしか聞こえないね。」
―つづく―




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